Moo's Review of Challengers: I Want a Churro!
At first, I thought this movie wasn't for me. Oh my God, are you kidding? It's just a couple of beautiful skinny people doing sports that I'm really bad at. I don't relate to any of them, they look perfect and they're so rich and they're so manipulative! And this love triangle messes with my expectations. What I actually want, you see, is not a triangle at all. I just want a line that's bent in the middle. I want two guys to chase after one girl and have no connection to one-another. Maybe just a frenemy-ship. Surely, the guys themselves aren't supposed to fall in love. That would just render the girl obsolete. What would possibly be fun about that?

As usual, this is going to be full of spoilers. So if you are allergic to them, stop right here and just know that I recommend it!
Summary
The movie opens with a tennis match between Art Donaldson (Mike Faist), clean boy, sponsored by Uniqlo, and Patrick Zweig (Josh O'Connor), fuck boy, sponsored by shorts that he slept in. On the sidelines watching is Tashi (Zendaya), who is paying way too much attention, because she likes both. Tashi started out as a tennis prodigy/beautiful girl, who these two fought over. She then suffers a boy-problem-induced accident and tragically loses her ability to play. The next 13 years of their lives is a messy entanglement of marriage, cheating, a daughter, and many broken tennis rackets. Until this match!

What I liked About It
Upon second watch, when I actually sat down to watch it without checking my phone the entire time, I realized this movie is PERFECT for me. I found every character relatable. Sure, they are still too perfect and too rich, but I related to them nonetheless. I related to Art's boredom of working on tennis for over ten years. I worked on art for over ten years omg tell me about it. I related to Patrick's struggle of choosing his passion over worldly comforts. I even related to Tashi for dealing with an injury that prevents her from doing what she loves! This one is too real, I have arm pain and a real fear of losing my ability to draw... actually let me not think about that one too much, it's too scary. As for the love triangle, I really enjoy the BL* aspect of it. It turns out, I didn't just want a line that's bent in the middle, I really appreciated the two guys sharing an underlying homo-eroticism. It's the most romantic thing! Because they couldn't just outright admit their feelings, it's a perpetual will they or won't they. There is always tension in every scene. Keeping us forever on the edge of our seats. The scene where Art and Patrick chomp down on a churro? A work of beauty! I want a churro right now. As for Tashi's involvement with the two men, I'm not sure how I feel about it! Do they actually love her? I am biased to believe they don't, because all the classic BL stories involve men exclusively. But this movie is not only BL, it shows that clearly, they do love Tashi. She marries Art, where she's in control, and she sleeps with Patrick, in a totally unpredictable pattern. She even has a kid, with either Art or Patrick! I think it's probably Patrick. Still, I can't help but feel that losing her ability to do what she loves because of that boy-problem-induced injury is too high of a price to pay. And also, I guess I do have a problem with triangles after all because it always feels like one person is being left out, but that's more of a me thing, not these character's thing. If all three of them get something important out of this entanglement, then it's really a net gain for them.

This movie is also powerful in a meta way. Tashi being a spectator of the two men playing tennis is a metaphor for how we the audience are spectators watching this movie. Does Tashi have power over the boys? Does she have less power? However involved she is, she is not participating in the actual match. Neither are we, we are not actually in this movie, we are watching the fictional story of Challengers. It seems like we don't have power, but we do! Just by watching it, we are interpreting the story in our own way, we are the story. In one perspective, it seems like Tashi's injury is what forced her to be on the sideline, but not really, she made the choice to still pursue coaching and still keep the guys in her life and in each-other's lives. Of course, one could make the bleak argument that Tashi had no power in this at all and the guys don't either because they were all probably too neglected by their parents or else they wouldn't be so messed up looking for love in inappropriate ways bla bla bla. But honestly, does this perspective help anyone? It's much more uplifting to believe that yes they are broken people, but they still make their own choices, and they're choosing each-other, and choosing tennis! And that's supremely entertaining to watch. These characters are in desperate need of therapy. But what would you rather watch, Zendaya watching two hot guys in therapy or Zendaya watching two hot guys grunting and sweating together?

My favourite scene is when Art and Patrick are in the sauna room alone, right before their match. They get into a confrontation, to me, they were right on the verge of making out! But no. Instead, Art insults Patrick and walks out of the room. It just breaks my heart! So did a lot of other scenes, actually. Did I mention I love Art and Patrick's dynamic? It's so frustrating that they can't just profess their love already, damn it! Ugh, I have to calm down. Tennis is the only way for them to show love. I still don't like that Tashi has to suffer a life-altering injury to be in the middle of it all, but perhaps she did make the best out of that situation. She did get to watch some good fucking tennis.

Challengers, 10/10 recommend!
*BL Is Boy Love, a type of fiction that involves boys being in love. My favourite kind back in university.
The marvelous writings that influenced me:
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